Together We Can Make It

The name of our program is "Together We Can Make It". It is a support group for separated and divorced people who want to begin the healing process so they may continue on with their lives.

The program, which runs for 8 to 10 weeks, addresses the issues of self-image, stress, anger, blame and guilt and loneliness. The facilitators are men and women who have been through the program and have attended a training session on how to be a facilitator. These are not professional counselors nor are they therapists. These people are simply reaching out to help their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. As Jesus tells us in scripture: "Amen, I say to you, whatever you do for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for Me." Matthew 26:45

During the weekly meetings participants are given the opportunity to verbalize their feelings of anger, confusion, guilt, and loneliness in strict confidence and without being judged.

This is a group of people who are reaching out for help but are not sure where or how to begin. As the weeks progress people become comfortable with each other and therefore more openly discuss the issues that are of concern to them.

The design of the program is to help people know that their feelings, as varied as they may be, are normal and they are not alone in their experiences.

During the divorcing process people lose sight of who they are. Through the discussions, individuals can begin to realize they are still the same person ... only their life style has changed.

Obviously, because of the separation or divorce, stress levels are greatly increased. By sharing ideas, positive ways of dealing with the added stresses are brought to light.

The blame and guilt of separation or divorce can be overwhelming. It is important to sort out what happened in the marriage relationship. It is also equally important to remember that there are two people involved not just one.

For some divorcing people, they are alone for the first time in their lives. How do they cope with or handle the loneliness? There is a great sense of purpose in giving of self in helping others. Because of the common bonds, new friendships are developed through Together We Can Make It. These friendships offer the opportunity for people to help others yet it also allows people to accept help.

Is forgiveness possible? Yes. Once the individual is ready to let go of the anger and grief, forgiveness is obtainable. They can then begin to focus on the important things in life; that is, their own life and that of their children.

They key to the success of the program is the willingness of the participants to do the work outlined in the program.

Before closing, I would like to share with you the success story of one woman who, because of the Together We Can Make It program now accepts and enjoys her life as a single woman.

She had been married for 31 years when she suddenly had to make the decision if she should remain in an unhealthy marriage or seek a divorce.

When she first entered the program, she had many doubts, questions and concerns, along with a low self-esteem. As the weeks progressed she began to face her situation in a more factual way. Her emotions, at times, got in the way of the realities of her situation, but through the discussions, praying, and listening to what other group members were saying, she knew that she had to face reality and put her emotions aside, as much as possible. Once she made the decision to go forward with the divorce, she grew into a self-confident and independent woman. She admits that at times, her doubts and fears still resurface, but the work she began in the program continues to nourish her soul and spirit.

Today she says that she celebrates her life as a single woman, thanks to the care, support, encouragement, love and prayers of the people who were are part of the Together We Can Make It program.

On Wednesday, October 17th, we will begin a new session here at St. Jane. Detailed information is in today's bulletin.

If anyone should have questions, I will be in the vestibule after Mass.

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